


Inner cravings

by ManmeatPK



Category: Original Work
Genre: And I am feeling feelings, Cravings, Dark, Denial of Feelings, Im a lonely piece of shit dont mind me, Loneliness, Other, Relationship(s), its midnight, thoughts
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-02-14
Updated: 2020-02-14
Packaged: 2021-02-28 00:47:14
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 543
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22724908
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ManmeatPK/pseuds/ManmeatPK
Summary: Finding a soul that entwines with yours is never something achievable.Your thoughts may turn twisted with craving, but only luck has a grasp over turning your missing pieces into a living form.
Comments: 1
Kudos: 1





	Inner cravings

I don't crave normal love. I crave something disgusting. Something violent yet so delicate it may break by just a small gust of wind.

I crave it so violently, it makes my nails scratch holes into walls, and my feet go numb from running after something that's out of my reach. I want to hold someone so close I can hear the blood flowing through their veins, my every breath tickling their skin and urging a heart beat to step nervously outside of their body. I want to catch that faint sound and seal it deep inside of me. I want it to contamine me, intoxicate my every thought and make me into a mess, so addicted to the sound that I will push every boundry to produce more and more to maintain my high.

I won't want to step a moment outside of the glass wall that keeps us together.  
I wouldn't go through a day without cherishing every crack in the wall, running my fingertips over its lines as my thoughts dent into the thin layer, the sharp edges cutting deep into my skin, leaving scars that will stay there until I close my eyes the last time.

I want someone who doesn't just feel comfort with me. I want someone who craves every moment our skin touches, the hot breaths escaping our lips, the sweat running down our eyelashes.

I want someone who will want to run their finger on my skin and imagine my heart, beating only for them and this moment. Someone who won't be satisfied until they devour me, tearing my skin, eating my lungs, chewing up my heart, clawing at my sight and breaking every bone. Never having enough, always craving more and searching further beyond the stars and planets that one can never achieve.

Something so feral, so wild it makes both of our souls scream for each other, fighting the moments when the cracks try to shatter the glass completely. Trying both to put together the shards of glass and fill in the holes.

I also want something so beautiful, so soft it could only be described as a blanket covering us that holds our warmth. Soft touches, gentle smiles, little presents. Eating icecream as we watch our favorite shows. Trying to show interest in each others likings. Finding the spark in the others eyes as they talk fascinating. Always holding hands to guide the baby steps we take together. Never leaving the other in a storm alone, drying the small droplets of cold water soaking into the skin under clothing.  
But also cherishing the moments when the air isn't filled with noise, when our minds race different ways and thoughts climb up to the ceiling, lifting up our house into the air, and taking us with it.

When the sky's glooms take away our words and leave hazy days, we will still continue on and come back to the place we built up. Erasing mistakes and correcting lines.

I want a person who will take away my soul, every tiny fragment of it, and fill themselves with it, loudly gulping it down in large quantities, never gasping for air. All while filling the empty space they make in me with their own fragments.

**Author's Note:**

> I felt the need to spill some of my thoughts. The more I am alone the deeper I feel like I'm falling into a dark place which I'm trying to crawl out of. People leave all the time and create an empty space in the place they used to stand. Filling in the places can never be done, you can only create more space for others who come into your life. Never keep the space around you closed, because emptiness can suffocate more than an overcrowded space.
> 
> Everyone who is going through these thoughts I wrote down and thinking, fuck, I feel this emptiness aswell, and feel the need to fill it up, please don't close yourself away. People come and go. Cherish every person who comes and gives you a piece of themselves, a piece of memory you can hold and put into the cracks in the walls that you have. Hang those memories up like art in a gallery and look at them with love. I hope everyone finds their happiness that fills them up.


End file.
